Stopping Time

Isn't it amazing that right when life gets to be the busiest, the body always manages to get sick within your moments of weakness?

While we are sick time seems to slow. Everyone around you is working hard and thoroughly through the day while we lay and ponder. Not even just thoughts, more like searching our souls. After all, you have to lay in bed all day. My as well get something done.

Some of our most troubling adversities can be solved within this train of thought. God loves us and wants us to be happy. When we are getting to be too busy to even remember to look around, he will take us down. Allowing us to admire our lives and realize things are not as bad as seemed.

Listening to the leaves fall and collect on the concrete outside the window. Listening to the stillness all around. Listening to our Heavenly Father whisper sweet things to us. I feel invincible.

Nothing can stop me.
I have learned a lot while down.

Us Mormons

Honestly?
I was attempting to study up on the election when I stumbled across this page:
http://www.votingforjesus.com/

This is THE silliest thing I have read about my religion in A LONG time.
I really hope no one listens to this person preach about something they know nothing about!
Man.... I've had my good giggle for the day. :)

Yes, I am a Latter Day Saint of Jesus Christ or otherwise known as Mormon.
I'm sorry but we do not believe ourselves to be a cult.
Even after listening to people call him a lunatic, I do believe that Joseph Smith was nothing shy of magnificent.
We believe that the gospel was taken off from the earth for a while because the people of the world were unable to believe. Joseph Smith converted countless lives and brought our religion back.
If people thought he was really evil why would he not change the name of the church after himself? No one would have known!
We are "The Latter Day Saints" because we are in the latter days.
From not drinking alcohol, not doing drugs, girls only piercing their ears one time, boys not piercing their ears, no coffee products, watching out for caffeine, food storage, and the unspoken not having sex until we are married in the temple. GASP! Yes!! We do not have sex until we are married. Crazy right??

We love to hear about our church through others! So this article I came across made me pity the people who would think such about us! We're really not that bad. :)

Like one comedian said, "Mormon's ain't so bad. If I have yard work to be done, I just put it off for a week or so. Because then they will get to it as a service project so I don't have to!"

Want to learn more??
CLICK ON ME:
http://mormon.org/
It can't hurt and no one has to know. ;)

Newly Found Freedom

Why is there so much pressure to go to school immediately after high school??

I do understand that if you stop going to class it makes it harder to go back. It is just unfortunate that kids will go to classes and have no idea what they want to do with their lives. There are so many opportunities out there for us to give a shot. It's difficult having such a short amount of time and paying a lot of money to go to college where you have to decide.

I got caught in the rush and decided to go to nursing school. I have been doing prerequisites for a year now and have been trying to experiment along the way.

Last November I found a passion for acting for film. It gave me a rush every time I did it. I did however, begin to shy away when I realized it is not an industry for people of my faith. I will keep trying that while I go to school.

I also am very artistic. I have a little schooling behind me that supports my arts but not a significant amount. There is no money in it. Or so I thought. I recently found out about special effects makeup. Hopefully I can try this field out as well while I go to school.

We need to remember that there are so many things to try before we get too caught up.

I want a career I will be happy with.
I want a career that I can get excited about.
Open your eyes and experiment.

Find your freedom.

Smile Towards The Devil

Nothing is impossible. So why do we make it seem so?? Isn't it a miracle that we are able to live??

My life has not been the hardest to live by any means, but I have been able to learn through my hardships: Go to college, you won't regret it. Live happily. Look to the future but never forget to admire the present. Never quit smiling. Regrets are necessary, learn form them. Jump at opportunities as they come. Do not think twice when it comes to making others happy. Remember to keep yourself happy as well. Stay in tune with God, life will be much better that way. ETC.

When young, I made a choice to stand up to those hurting, even if they couldn't stand themselves. I made friends that way, and was also made fun of. This is a decision I will never regret. I lost my confidence and grew into a hostile environment. Only because I made my environment that way. I loved the image of life, but wished there was something better for me out there. I began to be bullied through middle school. I lost my hope, I had no friends, I was living in my daydreams. Through this act I learned to grow into myself. I stopped caring, I stopped listening, I looked towards the future.

I cherish the fact that I was bullied because through my bullies, I was able to bloom. Now I am able to see people's true beauty. I am able to feel their anguish. Their hopelessness. I am able to try to help them.

One day I will own a charity.

..One day..

Plasticity

   It's interesting to see people break. They either cope and float. Or they do not. At the time in their life their problems seem to overtake them. Flooding the happiness out and replacing the soul with a cold watery person. They cannot see the light. They cannot find true happiness. Everything seems done. As it continues to climax, numb is what you become. All around you people are walking past. Never asking, never helping. As if standing in a busy street and having others pass by. Never even noticing the hole we seem to place ourselves into.
 
   We continue to reach for help in our minds, but never quite letting it release from our lips. We suck it in like a poison. It beats and scratches at our veins. But we'll never ask. Nothing is wrong, no one can fix me. We slowly fade out of reality. Living in a daydream. Wishing earnestly that we could slip away into our new life. Daydream, daydream, daydream.. Building, building, building..
 
   Finally, we break. The pressure is relieved. We've hit rock bottom. We cannot sink any lower. There is no where else to fall. Being alone is a reward. Reaching for our dreams, for we cannot descend anymore. Higher and higher we climb. We have the chance to make our daydreams reality. Reaching and inching. Grasping every handhold available. Until we slip. No help is offered.
 
   We make and break ourselves far too often. Learning to create ourselves. Who we are. What we believe. And whether we climb again.

A constant cycle.

Chubby and White

Isn't it interesting that when thinking about the word chubby and white, we usually are programmed to think UGLY and HIDEOUS? 

Back in the early years chubby and white showed wealth and importance.

You were white because you had enough money to hire individuals to work for you.

The workers were tan because of extensive sun exposure.

Chubby was iconic for "well fed". Usually the chubbies had more than enough food for their families.

Skinnies worked themselves to the bone so that their children would not starve. 

It's extremely curious that we now believe that tan and malnourishingly-skinny is true beauty.

I have been blessed with the gift of being able to see true beauty. It truly is a blessing from God.

We as individuals need to reprogram ourselves into seeing this beauty.

I have found that the easiest way to do so is to create a simple habit:

EVERY time you see someone and you automatically begin to judge them (I't just the way our brains work sometimes), think of 3 things positive to say about them!

I tried this out with my boyfriend. At first it began as a "Well she has nice hair" to, slowly but surely, "She seems to have a lot on her shoulders". Sympathy. That sympathy will help you to be able to feel grateful. Through being grateful you will begin to love yourself. You need to see beauty in yourself before you can see beauty in others.

JUST TRY IT!

3 Quick Kind thoughts about others. 

That's it.

Imagine our world when everyone is beautiful.

Inner Demons

Most nights I tend to remember 3-4 of my dreams. It is a daunting task to write down each dream with each remarkable detail. Only the ones that stand out most make it onto paper. As was last night's dream..

My friends and family along with myself, are sitting in various picnic tables at night. I believe we are celebrating something big. Through the laughter and smiles, I am mentally taking note of the happiness that is being spread from one individual to another. All of the faces illuminated by hanging lanterns. After a few minutes I notice the scene growing quiet. As I look towards the darkness figures slowly make themselves seen. Their faces are twisted in horrible agony. My brain cannot fully comprehend what I am staring at. I do believe however these beings are demons. The crowd of gloom slowly disperse themselves to the tables. They surround each table and begin spreading their message of eternal sadness and hatred by murdering each individual not strong enough to fight them off. I note that every person dying was unable to put their trust in god and his eternal plan. They are fearful of death. One by one they fall before us. My loved ones, gone forever.

When my table is approached I will not give in to the fear. I slowly begin to sing aloud any song that can come to my mind. The demons begin to stab me with their various sickles and knives, but none can puncture me. They slowly become thin as air, as each blow towards me turns to a smoke. I quickly spread the word, but not fast enough. By this time I have lost nearly half of my crowd. All I want to do is protect them and keep them safe. But by not believing that God is almighty, they perish.

Many of us run into a nearby home. Multiple fall in the battle. We enter the home and spread to each room. I take a room upstairs. The room is large, as is the home. The demons begin to bang on the locked door. I sprint to the bathroom and lock the door behind me just as I hear the explosion in the other room. The door has splintered to pieces. I push into a shower that is made of clear bricks and a small glass door. I curl into a ball as I sing to myself, my voice growing hoarse. Tears begin to warm my face as I realize how many people I have lost. What am I going to do when the demons surround the shower? What will I do when they realize there is no roof to this shower? The bangs grow louder as they make their way through the bedroom towards the bathroom. I can feel a warmth upon my back. I look to see where this is coming from as I notice the large window above the toilet. I quickly run and fumble the glass open. I climb through just as the demons begin to crack the bathroom door. I am running across the rooftop and climbing ever higher as I jump from house rooftop to rooftop. I however get to the end of the row of homes. I'm trapped in the corner about 50 to 60 feet up. I turn around and this time feel ready to battle. My voice grows louder and louder as the sun comes up. This will be the battle of my life. It's my turn to show my love to God. I begin to sing church hymns.

Then I wake up.

Anyone want to help me decipher this dream?? It terrified me a lot last night.

God is great. God is good. Let the storm come.